Sugar Secrets…& Lies Read online

  “Are you OK?” he asked, reaching out for her hand.

  “Uh-huh.”

  Kerry tried hard to stop her teeth from clenching quite so tightly.

  The band was much better than Ollie had expected. The venue at the back of The Bell pub was mobbed, and Ollie and Kerry were so late that they had to stand at the back, peering over the heads of the massed punters.

  Craning his neck, Ollie could see the lead singer – a girl with an amazing voice – dancing around the stage and singing over the top of Mick’s thundering guitar. Although his main reaction was to be impressed, Ollie also had to admit to a twinge of jealousy. His own band – The Loud – had only played a couple of gigs, and was at a standstill since Mick and Rob had decided to leave. And now here was Mick with his new band – sounding brilliant.

  Right there and then, Ollie made a promise to himself that once this charity gig was out of the way, he would concentrate on his own music. He needed to have a long chat with Joe about getting the band up and running again – they should discuss where to advertise for new musicians.

  The twinge of jealousy he’d felt suddenly evaporated and, full of new-found enthusiasm, Ollie turned to grin at Kerry.

  He was shocked to see how miserable she looked. So caught up in getting to The Bell in time to catch the start of the band’s set and his fascination at seeing how Mick was doing, Ollie hadn’t really paid her that much attention.

  But Kerry would understand that, wouldn’t she? Not by the expression on her face…

  “Are you OK?” he yelled in her ear.

  Kerry nodded, but didn’t meet his gaze. Then Ollie noticed that even though she was standing on tip-toe, she was struggling to see anything through the forest of big blokes in front of her. Maybe that was what was wrong?

  He darted away from her for a second and grabbed an unused bar stool from a nearby table.

  “Stand on this!”

  Ollie shoved the stool in front of Kerry and motioned to her to get up.

  “I couldn’t!” exclaimed Kerry.

  “Why not?” he yelled back.

  “People would stare at me! I’d feel really stupid!”

  “Don’t be daft – we’re right at the back! Who’s going to see you?”

  He meant it jokily, but Kerry obviously didn’t take it that way. Straight-faced, she clambered up on the stool and silently watched the band for the rest of the gig.

  Glancing up at her from time to time, Ollie was sure that her eyes were glistening, as if tears were just a moment away.

  What was going on?

  The evening that the two of them had looked forward to so much fizzled out like a damp firework. When the band finished playing, Ollie and Mick had greeted each other like long-lost brothers, while Kerry hovered on the sidelines.

  Now, sitting in the back of Mick’s car, a bloke called Pete and a guitar case separated Kerry from Ollie, who was still chattering away with Mick and Rachel – the singer from the band.

  Sitting directly behind Rachel, Kerry had a close-up view of her shiny, black bobbed hair. She noticed the way it swung cutely as she turned to answer Ollie, grinning a red-lipsticked, eye-twinkling grin especially at him.

  See? she thought. This is the kind of girl he really gets on with – someone lively, someone vivacious, someone not like me…

  She turned away and stared out the car window, recognising a street sign close to home and feeling relieved that this torturous evening was nearly over. For her at least. Maybe Ollie would go back to Mick’s – or even Rachel’s – and carry on having fun after they’d dropped her off.

  Absently tracing the track of a raindrop on the window, Kerry recounted every point of misery in the evening. The fact that Ollie had preferred to listen to Cat speaking ‘rubbish’ than meet her on time. The way he was more interested in the band – and particularly the very attractive Rachel – than her (he’d spent the whole night either watching them or talking to them). That tone of irritation in his voice when she wouldn’t stand on the stool. Oh, and not forgetting those ridiculous contact lenses!

  The minute they’d gone into The Bell, the smoky atmosphere had kick-started the whole pain process off again. She’d felt like a complete fool, perched on that stool, struggling to keep her eyes from spilling out stinging, lens-induced tears, while vowing to flush the stupid things down the loo the minute she got home.

  The car ground to a halt.

  “This is it, isn’t it, Kerry?” asked Mick.

  “Er, yes. Thanks for the lift,” she answered numbly, as she wrestled in vain to find the door handle. She was mortified when Rachel leant over and flicked it open for her.

  “See you tomorrow, Kerry – come in the shop, yeah?” Ollie’s voice drifted after her.

  “Uh-huh,” she muttered, bending and glancing back into the car, but not managing to make him out through the veil of tears that had become impossible to hold back.

  She slammed the door a little harder than she meant to, then heard the car speed away.

  Well, that was good going, she thought to herself as she tried to stop her hand shaking long enough to get her key in the lock. ? first date anda last date – alt in one…

  CHAPTER 11

  SURPRISE, SURPRISE!

  ‘“Scuse.”

  Kerry lifted her bag off the table so that Anna could wipe it clean.

  “At least somebody’s happy.”

  Her mood of gloom disturbed, Kerry followed Anna’s gaze across the road towards the launderette. Mad Vera, who ran it, was up to her usual tricks, singing along to the radio she always had playing, and dancing her way around the machines. Today, she’d turned her mop upside-down and was using it as a microphone, terrorising a young student who was clutching his box of washing powder tightly.

  Kerry and the others often whiled away their time at the window seat, idly watching her antics. Usually, Mad Vera made her laugh, but this particular Saturday morning Lily Savage, Eddie Izzard and Vic Reeves could all tap-dance past the café window and Kerry wouldn’t be able to raise a smile.

  “Bad day on the planet?” Anna asked, replacing the salt and pepper pots on the streaky, wet table.

  “Something like that,” Maya answered for Kerry, returning to the table with two cappuccinos and a couple of Danish pastries balanced on an old tin tray. “But it’s nothing that can’t be sorted, is it, Kez?”

  “Good,” smiled Anna. “Right, I’ll leave you to it. I’m officially supposed to be off for an early lunchbreak and I can see the cavalry arriving now…”

  Maya and Kerry glanced up at the same time as the bell on the door tinkled and Nick came barging in.

  “Sorry I’m late, Anna,” he said breathlessly, “I just stuck my head around the door at Central Sounds when I was passing and they had this beautiful reconditioned Fender Telecaster that I just had to try out.”

  “Uh-huh,” said Anna, dryly, arching her eyebrows at him.

  “It was the spitting image of one Keith Richards used to play back in…”

  “Nick,” Anna interrupted him, “I don’t care about what year some over-paid rock star played his guitar. I’m supposed to be taking an early lunch so you can slope off this afternoon, remember? And if I don’t go now, I’m going to end up with no lunchbreak left.”

  “Yeah, right. Sorry. But Anna – can you just give me two minutes? I should nip next door and remind Ollie that he’s got to cash up for me tonight.”

  “No,” said Anna firmly, untying her white apron and pushing it into Nick’s palms-up, pleading hands. “I want my lunchbreak now and you’ve mucked my shifts about far too many times in the last couple of weeks.”

  Maya grinned over the table at Kerry. “Anna’s really got Nick toeing the line, hasn’t she?” she whispered.

  Kerry didn’t respond. Hearing Ollie’s name and knowing that he was only next door made her stomach back-flip. She pushed the Danish pastry away from her, her appetite suddenly shot.

  “OK, let’s get back to what we wer
e talking about,” said Maya soberly, turning her attention away from Nick and Anna back to Kerry’s disastrous date. She’d become Kerry’s confidante for the day, since Sonja had been roped into doing something with her sisters and wasn’t available to lend a supportive shoulder to cry on.

  Maya delicately tore a piece of pastry off her sticky bun and got ready to make her proclamation.

  “Right, I’ve thought about what you’ve told me, and I understand what you’re saying, but basically—” Kerry automatically shrank from whatever stern and sensible words were coming “—I think you’ve over-reacted to the whole situation and got everything out of proportion.”

  Kerry knew this was only what Sonja would have said, more or less, but it would have been wrapped up a lot more attractively in upbeat words and big hugs.

  “Look at it this way,” Maya continued, tucking her long sheen of brown-black hair behind her ears. “Ollie’s not like Matt, bless ‘im. He wouldn’t muck you around and flirt with other girls, whether it was Elaine or this girl Rachel. He’s just not made that way! And Cat, well, much as I’m fond of her, I wouldn’t put it past her to stir things a bit, just for her own amusement.”

  “Cat would never… I mean, do you really think she’d do that?” asked Kerry, aghast. She was always slightly wary of Cat, but couldn’t see her doing anything that underhand.

  “Maybe,” shrugged Maya. “But then maybe I’m being a bit harsh. All I’m saying is, don’t place a whole lot of importance on anything she’s got to say. I think half of everything she comes up with is straight out of that fertile imagination of hers.”

  Maya’s words did start to make sense to Kerry. Cat was good for a laugh – sometimes – but she wasn’t the most reliable person in the world.

  “And one other thing – I’m sure a lot of what you’re feeling is down to the fact that you’re mad at yourself for not just coming out and asking Ollie about Elaine.”

  That was true, Kerry acknowledged. She should have been brave and brought up the subject of Elaine, clearing the air there and then. But the time had never been right and the tension inside her had just got worse and worse as the night went on.

  Maya paused in her straight-talking as the café door tinkled open and Joe padded towards them.

  “What’s new?” he asked, sliding into the seat next to Maya and pinching a crumb of icing from her plate.

  “Kerry thinks it’s all over with Ollie,” Maya answered bluntly.

  “Maya!” Kerry gasped. “Tell the world, why don’t you!”

  “It’s hardly the world – just Joe!”

  Joe’s reaction was pretty hard to read. To the uninitiated, it could look like plain old embarrassment, but his friends knew it was more complex than that. Behind the blushing, startled expression Joe often wore, plenty more was hidden – they just couldn’t quite work out what, half the time. Even to Ollie, who’d known him for ever, shy Joe could be a bit of a mystery.

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean that how it sounded,” Maya apologised. She knew she could be tactless sometimes – she never did see the point of mincing her words – but she didn’t like to think she’d ever hurt Joe. It would be like kicking the Andrex puppy.

  “I know,” he said, with a smile that didn’t quite mask that funny, unsettled look of his. “So, what’s happened, Kerry?”

  She felt slightly uncomfortable with the idea of talking to Joe about Ollie. What if Ollie had already told him about last night and his version of events? Joe was very trustworthy, she knew, but it still didn’t seem right to moan to him about his best mate.

  “I don’t know, we just had a bit of a weird night last night for one reason or another,” she said vaguely.

  “But she’s going to get it sorted, aren’t you?” said Maya firmly.

  For a second, just as she glanced past him at Maya, Kerry thought she saw a flicker of disappointment on Joe’s face. But, as Maya had so readily pointed out earlier, she couldn’t really trust her judgement on anything right now.

  “But how can I?” she whimpered. “If Ollie—”

  “Kerry – this isn’t just about you, or even you and Ollie.” Maya suddenly seemed as grown-up and professional as her dad. Dr Joshi always made Kerry feel like an awe-struck five-year-old whenever she met him – either in his surgery or at their house. Now Maya was giving off that same imposing aura.

  “It’s about all of us. If you two have problems, it could affect every one of us and our friendship.”

  Kerry remembered the vow she’d made to herself not so long ago about not getting involved with Ollie for that very reason, and felt slightly ashamed. Of course Maya was right.

  “I should go and see him, shouldn’t I?”

  “Yes,” said Maya, nodding. “And right now.”

  “But I…”

  “Nick!” Maya shouted unexpectedly, looking over to the counter behind which he was standing, the white apron now tied round his ample waist.

  Kerry was confused – what was Maya playing at?

  “Yep?” Nick answered distractedly.

  “Kerry’s nipping next door. Should she remind Ollie about cashing up for you?”

  “Yeah! Nice one, Kerry!” said Nick, giving her the thumbs-up.

  Without another word, Kerry agitatedly picked up her bag and left.

  “Why do people make their lives so difficult, Joe?” said Maya wearily, after the door had juddered closed behind Kerry.

  “Don’t ask me,” said Joe, agonisingly aware that he was making his own life difficult by choosing to be in love with Kerry. Although he didn’t really have any choice in the matter.

  “I mean, look at Ollie and Kerry – they’re perfect together,” Maya continued, combing her fingers through her sheaves of long dark hair. “But they’re managing to make each other miserable!”

  “I know,” nodded Joe. But he was only agreeing to the first part of what Maya had said. Kerry and Ollie were perfect together. More perfect than he and Kerry ever could be.

  They were his two favourite people and, without knowing it, they were breaking his heart.

  And there was nothing he could do about it.

  The butterflies in her stomach were making Kerry feel slightly queasy, and she was glad of the blast of cool air as she stepped out on to the pavement. She didn’t glance back at Maya and Joe sitting at the window table of the café. They would have made her feel even more self-conscious and she didn’t quite trust herself not to turn tail and run as it was.

  She knew that seeing Ollie and talking things through was the right – the only – thing to do, but it was going to be so hard. What sort of reaction would she get? Understanding? Bewilderment? Annoyance? Anger?

  Kerry still wasn’t sure to what degree she’d exaggerated the problems of the previous night. But what on earth had gone through Ollie’s mind?

  I’m so stupid, she scolded herself. I finally get it together with Ollie, and I risk it all by getting worked up about nothing!

  The door of Slick Riffs was in front of her. Kerry took a deep breath and pushed… but it didn’t budge. She pressed her fingers more firmly on the chipped blue paint of the door and tried again. Nothing.

  Puzzled, Kerry bent down and peered between the notices taped to the glass into the gloomy interior of the shop. Squinting, she couldn’t make anything out at first. Then, just as she was about to straighten up, a slight movement at the back of the shop caught her eye – and her heart lurched painfully.

  Ollie was stroking Cat’s vividly coloured hair with one hand while his other arm was wrapped affectionately around her. Kerry sprang from the glass as if an electric shock had passed through it at the exact second that Ollie lifted his gaze and stared directly at her.

  CHAPTER 12

  OLLIE EXPLAINS

  “KERRYKERRYKERRY!” “Not now, Lewis.”

  Lewis stared at his sister, who was huddled on her bed, clutching a pillow close to her. Barney was curled up at her feet, his chin resting on her knees, his big brown eyes starin
g dolefully at her. Kerry’s cheeks looked wet.

  “Are you sad?”

  “Yes, Lewis, I’m sad. Now, you want to leave me alone, please?”

  “OK,” he shrugged, pulling the door closed behind him.

  Then he pushed it open again.

  “What?” Kerry half barked, a sob sticking in her throat.

  “I forgot,” he said simply. “Ollie’s at the door.”

  Kerry dropped her head on to the pillow she was clutching and groaned. She wasn’t ready to see him.

  She’d only been in the house ten minutes and hadn’t yet caught her breath yet from running all the way home. But she couldn’t ask Lewis to lie for her and say she wasn’t in. Lewis couldn’t even understand the concept of boys and girls voluntarily kissing, so the intricacies of breaking up were way beyond him.

  Standing nervously on the doorstep, Ollie glanced up as he heard footsteps on the stairs. His heart melted when he saw Kerry. With her hair unleashed from its clips, and falling in tangled curls, she looked like some tragic, Pre-Raphaelite heroine. He was trying to picture the particular Rossetti painting she reminded him of when the poetic moment switched to something more like a cartoon.

  In a flurry of thumping feet and paws, Lewis and Barney thundered past Kerry and descended on Ollie.

  “OLLIEOLLIEOLLIE! Kerry’s SAD!”

  “Yeah, I know, Lew,” said Ollie, looking up from the little boy to his big sister, who was lingering behind him in the hall.

  “Can you make her laugh?”

  Ollie looked pleadingly at Kerry.

  “I’ll try,” he answered.

  “You’d better come in,” said Kerry flatly, turning and walking up towards her room again. Ollie closed the door behind him and, wiping the hand that was covered in dog slobber on his jeans, followed her upstairs.

  “Tell her a joke! She likes them!” came Lewis’s advice from below.

  Kerry took up her position on the bed and stared wordlessly at Ollie. He wanted to run over and gather her up in his arms right then, but he was too scared she’d push him away or even thump him right at this moment.